Your 5 roles
There’s a video of a great guy that I show at each Time Management training. His name is Jim Lafferty and you won’t find him over the internet unless you add “P&G” after his name.
He says in his Work Life Effectiveness training that you should aim to have 5 main roles in your life.
“Someone asked me if he could do more than 5. I don’t know. I tell you this: I’m a pretty efficient guy, and I can only do 5. Maybe you can do 6, give it a shot. But 5 is the best I could ever do.”
“I love to play golf. That was until my wife made me attentive about this. She said “You’re all day at work, and then you’re with your friends playing golf. I never get to see you!”
So I started counting my roles. P&G: can’t really drop that, it kind of pays the bills. Father – I can’t drop that. Husband – I’m not dropping that. Son – Can’t drop that. Fitness Instructor – I can’t allow myself to be completely out of shape. Golfer…Uh-oh.
I’ve played one round of golf in the past 15 years. That’s life. You gotta make choices.”
So being an effectiveness coach, I had a rather ironic situation today. Counting my roles, I got to 7. No wonder I was feeling overwhelmed, overworked, bitchy and possessive over my personal time.
What I did, with the help of my coach (thanks Ruba!
) was to split them over spans of 3 weeks rather than a single week. So I get to fulfill most of my roles, but one at a time, every other week or so. I can’t please everyone, and at least I know there’s going to be a bit of time just for myself at the end of the day. And I’m making choices based on what I want.
Like the choice to post this on my blog rather than send that email at work, that email that’s been waiting for me for 2 days…:)
I was just going to thank you for the post as I was reading it
and then I read the last paragraph, happy its working for you and keep those lovely posts coming (so one more role..blogger
)
Ruba
September 9, 2009 at 3:36 pm
[...] up in that suit talking to people you’re never going to meet again, don’t go. Since I spread my “roles” throughout 3 weeks, or even 1 month, I don’t feel pressured anymore to visit my grandmother. [...]
On obligations « Coaching Tips on Effectiveness
October 11, 2009 at 12:04 pm
[...] complicated from here on. You’ve entered a student association, and this means an additional role to you. How are you going to manage [...]
Life Management workshop – Take 1 « Coaching Tips on Effectiveness
November 15, 2009 at 8:47 am
[...] complicated from here on. You’ve entered a student association, and this means an additional role to you. How are you going to manage [...]
Life Management Workshop – Take 1 - Life Management. Life Toolkit - Coaching and more
November 15, 2009 at 8:54 am